Never weaponize or leverage affection.

It is often said that you should teach people how to treat you and that is true but if you go down the road of using Pavlov’s concept of positive and negative reinforcement, you are not treating your partner like a human, you are treating them like a dog.  If people being called a dog is an insult, imagine how your partner will feel being treated like one.  Instead of weaponizing affection, have open, honest and direct conversations to achieve change.